Continuing my work with the 5 of wands…
To truly begin delving into these shadow aspects, I have decided to envision myself as someone who has the internal strength that I am trying to cultivate within myself. What does this look like to me?
I picture myself as being someone who has clear values and morals. I know what is important to me and I know what I want out of life. I have set clear boundaries with others, which allow me to be open minded to the thoughts of others without allowing myself to be taken advantage of or disrespected. I understand my worth as a human being, yet I am still humble. I understand that everyone, myself included, has a right to vocalize their thoughts and opinions. No one is more entitled to have their voice heard than I am. Likewise, I am no more entitled to speak my truth than any one else. We all deserve to be heard. I know that part of being a good communicator is understanding that there is a time to talk and a time to listen. I understand that most people’s thoughts and opinions stem from a lifetime of conditioning, so I can respond to people that I do not agree with with patience, respect, and love. I have put in the work to explore and undo my own conditioning. Therefore, the values, morals, opinions, and thoughts that I have are based strictly of my inner truth and my highest self. The thoughts and opinions of others can’t hurt me because I understand that they are based on conditioning instead or truth. Additionally, I understand that I still have room to grow and much more to learn. Even in the most difficult interactions with others, there is something to be learned, and in most cases, appreciated. I understand how difficult it is to undo one’s conditioning, so I am empathetic towards others who have not yet chosen to do this work. My self awareness and self worth allow me to understand that even uncomfortable things must be expressed, as they would often do more harm than good if repressed. However, I also understand that there is difference between expression of emotion and spewing hatred. Because of this, I express my thoughts and opinions in a respectful way without name calling, guilt tripping, blaming, or otherwise hurting or manipulating others. I value myself enough to walk away if an individual or group does not respect me. If my words are not being respected, then the people I am trying to communicate with don’t deserve them. However, I also realize that working with others is often necessary, and I should ensure that I am doing everything that I can to make the people around me feel seen and heard. There is more than one way to communicate, I should always strive to try out different communication styles when working with others. Compromise is a key part of working with others. I understand that I may not always get my way. However, I strive to be open minded while standing firm in the things that are important to me. I am not afraid to express myself to others and I view others, even complicated people, as teammates instead of opponents. Love and empathy drive all of my interactions, with others and with myself. My empathy, love, and inner strength protect me from being hurt by the things that other people say and do. I own up and take responsibility for my own contributions to a conflict. I know that I am not perfect, and that part of being a strong person is being open to learn new things and to admit when you are wrong. (I keep picturing a mountain in my mind) I want my inner strength to be like a mountain, steady, self assured, and unbothered/detached….yet completely aware of of the give and take exchanges that are necessary to connect all living things to one another.
Now that I have made a vague draft of the type of inner strength that I want to cultivate, I think that I will spend tomorrow considering the person that I am right now in this moment.
These shadow work posts are truly for my own self discovery and development, but I than those of you who have take then time to read this. I will continue to work with my shadow aspects relating to the 5 of wands for the rest of the week OR until I feel that it is time for me to move onto another card/shadow aspect.
Love Always, AnxiouslyM